How do Czechs talk to cats? Textbooks only teach the names for animals and the sounds they make, but not what to say to them. It’s difficult to find information online, which makes sense since talking to pets is more intimate and private, plus there aren’t really any rules. Most of my initial search results were for understanding cat body language and behavior, which is of course what’s most important to know. However, I’m already a good cat whisperer. What I want to know is how to say, “you have such a cute fuzzy belly!” or “look at your little paws!” and if “máš tak roztomilé chlupaté bříško” or “podívej se na své tlapičky!” is even something Czechs would say to a cat.

My boyfriend and I recently adopted a three year old cat named Perla. Her owner was a local Czech man who was unfortunately deported a few months ago. My Czech teacher was taking care of Perla with the plan to reunite them when she went home for the holidays, but sadly Perla’s owner had to make the decision that it would be better for her to stay in the US with a new family. My beloved 18 year old cat Buckminster passed away in June, and when my teacher first took Perla in, I loaned some of Bucky’s things to her since she was only going to be taking care of Perla temporarily. I was really heartbroken when Bucky died, and I had wanted to wait until next year before thinking about getting another cat. I had even been offered some kittens recently, but I did not feel ready for it. However, when my teacher asked if I’d like to give Perla a forever home, it immediately felt right.

It soon occurred to me that Perla’s first human language was Czech, so I was going to have to work on my cat dialect. Okay, I didn’t have to, but it sounded like fun! I don’t think I had even thought about how to speak to cats until a year or two ago; speaking to humans is already difficult enough. Other than trying to call Bucky with “pojď či či či” a few times, I had never spoken to him in Czech.

I asked my teacher and some people online for tips on what they say to cats, and I’ve checked pet supply stores, pet care articles, people’s home videos on YouTube, and children’s songs for tips. I’ve also directly translated some of the things I would typically say in English, because proč ne? It’s not like anyone’s going to actually hear any of this. Here is my list of words and phrases so far; I’ll add to it when I find more.

The diminutive for Perla is Perlička. I didn’t want to change her name, because I love calling to her “Perličko kočičko!” However, there is another form of her name, Perluše, to be used when she is “zlobí.” I’ve only had to use it once so far, when she was helping me frame some posters and was being a bit too much of a “bláznivá kočička.”

As many pet owners will understand, it is also important to have at least one song to sing to your pet. There are two Waldemar Matuška songs from the ‘60s that I like which fit the bill and are fun to sing!

Na okně seděla kočka
Byl horký letní den
Na okně seděla kočka
A koukala se ven

Mám rád kočky
Kočky s očky jako cvočky
líbí se mi, či, či, či
Dívky schůzi kočičí

Do you talk to your cat in Czech? Did I get anything wrong, or is there something I should add to my repertoire? Chtěla bych to vědět!

Bonus video: “Mám doma kočku” by Pokáč. Fortunately, the lyrics don’t fit Perla (yet) so I wouldn’t sing it to her, but I think many cat owners could relate!